Something That Gets My Panties In A Wad.....

I hate these:

Lawn Geese are an abomination in my eyes. I hate them and I hate their costumes. Like this:

Now I can understand why Scrooge was such an asshole - his neighbors probably dressed their lawn geese up like this every damn Christmas. But it gets worse (better?). Check this out:

This one makes me feel sorry for the Irish - it's bad enough that they're all lushes but now we dress geese up like them? Tough break, guys. Better go grab a Guiness to cope. But America, you're not any safer from the damn lawn geese and their stupid clothes:

This makes me want to be communist.

And finally, even Christ's death is mocked by the lawn geese:

When I was a kid, we would get a new Easter dress every year.....so when did lawn geese start getting their own special holiday clothes? Little bastards. And look at the one dressed as a rooster - how flippin' ridiculous. It's a concrete goose - why dress it up as another bird????? And a side note - what in the bloody hell do roosters have to do with Easter???? Explain, please!

Ugg, these things and the people who have them are just another sign in my mind of the decline of civilization - this is how the Roman Empire fell, you know? They started putting lawn geese out and then they started dressing said geese in togas and the rest is history.

What I really like to see, and what my friends and I did in high school, is the lawn geese dressed up in lingerie. Now that, my friends, is a classy idea. Nothing is funnier than a lawn goose wearing a strategically stuffed black lace teddy....think about it for a minute - trust me, you'll laugh. And then you'll want to do it yourself.